cantankerosity | - Part 3

Happy Cantankerous Birthday to Bob!

 Posted by at 14:10  Coot Comedy, Coot Smirk, principles, Up With
Mar 312015
 
Birthday, Cake with candles

Image via Wikipedia

Hello everyone. Well, why you are waiting for the next installment from the coots, it has come to my attention that Monday has been gathering cobwebs around here. I guess it is either up to me to change that or delegate it to someone else.

As for today, Facebook has informed me that this is the day that Bob was dug out from under a rock somewhere in the back country and mercilessly prodded into a lifetime of Cantankerosity.

Finally, a thing that Facebook is actually good for. At any rate we here at the Coots, well at least me and I would assume Ralph but his cantankerous button has been turned up to high lately, would like to wish our colleague Bob a Happy Birthday.

I will have to come up with some fancy song like in one of those restaurants who can’t bring themselves to go traditional because of pending charges from Michael Jackson. Wait, Michael is dead, who got all of the Beatles songs and Happy Birthday rights?

Well, happy birthday Bob, I don’t expect tomorrows live broadcast to be too cantankerous, it was just your Birthday after all. But then again, last week all of his plumbing in the yurt tried to go to hell on him.

There is no telling with Bob.

Happy Birthday Brother,
-Justin

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Up with Cantankerous Old Coots Lessons

 Posted by at 11:03  Coots Lessons, rants, Up With
Feb 232015
 

Newer readers may not have noticed that there is an instructive dimension to Cantankerous Old Coots. Early on Justin and I created a series of Cantankerous Old Coots Lessons designed to help fledgling Coots perfect their cantankerosity. Starting with Lesson 1 “Let it out” up to Lesson 21 “Cantankerosity lasts” we provided direction to COC wannabees. We even established Cantankerous Old Coots University with an ebook containing augmented versions of lessons 1 through 5. It was a glorious vision. We would help create a more perfect world by communicating the COC vision as stated in our manifesto and help spread the COC message to the initiated..

Coots in action

We imagined that COC would wake up hundreds of sleepwalkers from the boring tedium that is 21st century life. We were certain that slowly- over time- our readership would grow and more Coots would join with us to spread the spirit of cantankerosity. We were wrong.

COC gets read but as far as we can tell, no one wants to join the ranks, take the lessons seriously and move into serious cantankerosity. Our most popular post continues to be Coots Lesson 13 “Same to you.” a thoughtful and timeless lesson from Justin about standing up for yourself. It isn’t clear to us why this lesson resonates so well with our readers but as we struggle to understand our reader’s thinking we wonder why their pleasure with Lesson 13 doesn’t cause them to check out Lesson 12 or even Lesson 14.

Then I get it. Our readers are indeed Cantankerous Old Coots. They can’t be bothered with the effort required to locate those other lessons just like Justin and I can’t be bothered with creating a web page with links to all the lessons. This is the most encouraging news we’ve had in months because it means that we are finding Coots and Coot wannabees out in the blogosphere. They have found COC and appreciate the message and like good Coots, they are not willing to waste any time or effort to make us feel better. They have a mission to improve their quality of their lives. Improving the quality of our lives here at COC, not so much.

We clearly didn’t connect all the dots when we developed our business model here at COC. We talked a cantankerous game but measured our results using ordinary standards. What this suggests is that more people might enjoy the COC Lessons if we got off our double-wide asses and created an index of those lessons with convenient links. Being user friendly and customer service focused is not generally the prime directive here at COC This is going to take some time to sort out. Stay tuned.

 

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Should we rename us the Stumbling Old Coots?

 Posted by at 11:03  Ask A Coot!, Plain 'ol Cantankerous, rants
Feb 232015
 
Coots on a tire

Coots on a tire (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It seems that all I do on here anymore is bitch.  And it is sounding like a broken freaking record.  But it is something posted at least.  Here is the deal.  Cantakerous Old Coots is darn near a one person operation from Ralph.  I put some stuff in once in a while.  Bob has been MIA while working through his various programs and computer problems.

So some input, what should we do with the Coots?  I am sure that Ralph is getting tired of being the only Cantankerous one here, and I am not sure about his commitment to Cantankerosity after that Venice trip.  He may need some more time to revive that cantankerous attitude.

As for me, I am trying to get back in the writing saddle all over the board.  I ostensibly call myself a writer and creator of web content but I am resting on my laurels from the past.  So, if you are reading this, tell me what you would like to see from the Coots.  New content daily?  A break from Ralph?  Podcast revive?  Bob’s politics?  More News? More Hansi?

That comment section down there has been more active in the past couple of weeks than it has in a while.  Keep it up.  Let us know what the people want.  While this is far from a democracy here, we will listen to your suggestions and implement or reject as needed.  You all just have to let us know.  We will be anxiously awaiting, well more like just sitting here doing something else waiting for comments to come in and enlighten us.

You all can do it.  Just a few words down there.  In the comments.  you know at the bottom.

More to come…..

-Justin

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Some small modicum of defense

 Posted by at 11:03  Uncategorized
Feb 232015
 
Relief map of Europe and surrounding regions

Image via Wikipedia

Ralph likes to dish stuff out.  He likes to rail on myself and Bob about not getting our posts out.  I have one thing to say to him!  You’re right.  If it wasn’t for Ralph, this blog would be like my other one.  By the way, if you have ever visited my other blog at justinsbrainpan.com, you may have noticed that the domain now shows a girl who I am sure is way to young to be desireable and some ads.  If you missed it, I have changed the domain (and host) to www.catharsisofthebogue.com.  Like the phone company lady says, Please make a note of it.

Now back to that…..Ralph.  Yes my balls have been dropped, wait, that sounds wrong.  I have repeatedly dropped the ball and posts have not been flying from my fingers like the proverbial roomful of monkeys.  I am not going to promise a change, but at least there are a few of my posts peppering the site from here and there, unlike Bob.  He is into taking the video world by storm and making a site that will make all of the other “How To” sites weep like little girls.

But where are the posts that were promised Robert?  I only hope that the Political Coot is a hit and we are getting loads of undeserved traffic.  Well slightly deserved traffic.  And you know what else? I keep finding places where www.catharsisofthebogue.com is not the current link for my stuff.  Good grief I have a lot of things that are pointing to the old site and not at www.catharsisofthebogue.com.

But I digress.  What are we going to do this year as the coots?  Well we are going to let Ralph carry us for the most part.  He doesn’t seem to have anything to do other than write anyway, (well there is that Europe trip so his wife will not either castrate him or hang him by his ankles in the town square) and Bob and I will contribute infrequently and sporadically.  That way it will keep you readers guessing when I am going to shower you with shit er wisdom.

Cantankerous Old Coots is a great site with some wonderful things going on in the cantankerous realm of Cantankerosity.  I can’t exactly recall what those great things are right now, but trust me, they are great.  Keep coming back here and reading this drivel that I am producing, you will be grateful for the poetry that Ralph puts out.  Bob is on his own, he likes video anyway.

Stay tuned faithful readers, there will still be variety here at the coots most of the time.  Otherwise, I guess this is just ralphcarlsonblog.com part deux.

Have a dandy weekend.

-Justin

PS I am curious to know why the “suggested post tags” came up with Preparation H as a term…..I am confused.

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Year End Coots Awards

 Posted by at 11:02  Blog Recaps, Coot Smirk, principles
Feb 232015
 

 

Well folks, in the grand tradition of sites everywhere I am participating in yet another year end post.  Today I have a few awards to hand out.

 

We will start right here with the coots:

Justin, that’s me, gets the Laziest Coot  with the most Crap to Do award.  I award myself this because it seems the hours that used to be productive are now stolen by a 1 year old and cleaning up the house.  I can only hope that 2012 will allow me to get more sleep and concentrate more on my business and making some dough.  Both bread and money.

Ralph will get the Most Persistent award.  It seems like he has nothing better to do most of the time so he writes.  He has kept this blog afloat this year and even went above and beyond to get a post out on Christmas.  Well done Ralph.

Bob gets an award that is similar to mine.  He gets the Too Damn Much on His Plate for His Own Good award.  This year has seen him start several sites and purchase much software that will keep him occupied for hours trying to figure it out.  And then he suckers me into his world as well….

To Hansi, he gets the Only Person Who Reads this Blog Consistently and Comments award.  If it wasn’t for  him, we would have no interaction at all.

To Steve Jobs, the About Damn Time You Gave Up award.  Now I am not against Steve Jobs, but, good grief if you know what I mean.

To JustHost.com, they get the You Lost A Customer With Your Crap Policies and Mediocre Customer Service award.  That title says it all, but the best service I have received from them over the last 2 years was when I was canceling my account there.

and in a related award, To HostGator.com.  There is a reason everyone and their dog recommends them.  They get the You Gained A Customer With Clear Policies and Customer Service That Should Be The Textbook Model for Customer Service Around The World In Every Field award.

To Google, you get the award for making us all paranoid about SEO rankings and what we are going to do to keep from getting blackballed in the rankings.  I call it the “Thanks For Making All Of Us Your Bitch” Award.

To Bing, you get the What The Hell Is Bing Anyway award.

and finally to our lawmakers in Washington, you get the I Voted For This?? award for proposing SOPA.  Look it up if you wish I don’t want to explain it more than to say it is stupidity on the hoof, at your expense.

Well that about wraps it up for this year and this edition of the Coots Awards.  We are staring firmly into the gaping maw of 2012 and I am kind of getting a “Sarlaac Pit” feeling, it is going to be a long year.

Yet, for all of that, Happy New Year from the Coots.  Now go get your Christmas Lights down and lets look forward to Martin Luther King Day.

-Justin

 

PS here are some doozy articles that we have written and you may have missed.  Enjoy.

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