Feb 152013
 
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English: Barack Obama delivers a speech at the...

I have noticed a trend in my email lately.  No not the typical SPAM about a dead relative to leave me money, or even the ones about Obama changing laws to get car insurance for $3 a month or some ridiculous thing.

I have noticed that many of those emails come in, from the future.  That’s right, the future.  Hours or even days into the future.  Now, I am not really sure why I have been chosen to be a prognosticator of deals and money forgotten by some millionaires in other countries, but I am.  I am able to tell my SPAM fortune.

It seems that I can also predict (somewhat) how Google will look at this post.  Thanks to Bob I know know I have to ramble on about this for another 150 words or so, inserting links and pictures as they come.   Or should I?  Hold on, I will check my email and see if the future holds anything  that will help us in the search engine rankings.

Nope, nothing is there, but I can make untold riches with this new system that will generate $2460 per day.  That would be helpful.  Not likely, but helpful.

So, now I have a question.  To all of you out there, do you get mail from the future or is it just me?  If you are getting mail from the future then I am no longer special and will have to, well, do something.  But I would still like to hear from some of you out there.

And another question, who sends these things and who writes the programs that allow people to see into the future and send me the email?  Why can’t they use that power and send me the winner of the Superbowl and the world series so that I can bet on them?  I guess their power does not go that far….cheeky bastards.

let me know your thoughts.

-Justin

 

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Justin

Justin is the young Coot with a Cantankerous Soul who continues to be educated by older, more cootish Ralph and Bob. His Cantankerosity is his own.

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  5 Responses to “I can see into the future…”

  1. Justin,
    I don’t know if my emails are coming from the future but the consensus seems to be that I will have a much larger penus.

  2. I will forward you the emails I have for Canadian Viagra, sounds like you will need it.

  3. Justin, I get those prognistakat…progris…prignostac…fortune tell emails too. I just deleted one that says I will add 10,000,000…yep, TEN MILLION viewers to my site by tomorrow! Now, if only I had the $27.00 they want to show me how…

    Also, like Ralph I get the sex ads…mine usually fall into the cheap imitation Viagra/Cialis group and probably work as well as any placebo.

    My favorite though is the ad that has an offer JUST FOR ME! Someone, somewhere (offshore, beyond our fraud laws, I’ll bet) where there is a website already set up just for me. Of course even though it is supposed to be a personal relationship thing, like I am their friend or something, I get suspicious when it is addressed to an admin@ or support@ email address.
    Bob@HayleStorm Interactive´s last Blog Post ..SEO today-a fast moving target

    • I like it when the email is addressed to Dear {NAME} or the first part of your email because they are too lazy to set the fields correctly to display your actual name. When those say they are from a distant relative who wants to put the money to good use I have to wonder. I talked to my uncle on the phone the other day who I haven’t seen for probably 20+ years, he remembered me and actually used my name…imagine that, a man I barely know remembered my name after over 20 years but the long lost relative who wants to give me money can only call me {NAME}.

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