CFBTN for 25 may 2012…or is it?

 Posted by at 11:02  Coot Comedy, Funny News
Feb 232015
 

Hey folks.  I was sitting here thinking about the CFBTN and looking at some stats.  I don’t know if it is being valued.  No comments, not much readership, I would like some real feedback at the end of this post or I may just shelve it for a while.  Ralph is still going strong with the Coots News Service on Sundays and maybe 2 news days are just too much.  Besides, most of the news lately is funny anyway.

Mao Sugiyama Cooks, Serves Own….

You know what, there are things I am not going to put on here.  Now where is that link to the see through swimsuit…..

Dumb women more attractive – study

Now here is some nice solid scientific evidence of the No Duh!  Ok I like smart women but smart women, like my wife, are not being sought out by the magazines.  Let’s face it, in America we like our eye candy dumb so we can appreciate the smart ones in our homes.

"'A man may be down but he's never out!' ...

"'A man may be down but he's never out!' Home Service Fund Campaign. Salvation Army. May 19 — 26 1919." Salvation Army poster. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Rigged device explodes at Salvation Army; 2 hurt

There are two ways to go with this.  First, a training accident at the Salvation Army!  Maybe they should get some real Army guys in there to train them.  Second, who the hell benefits from blowing up the Salvation Army???  A charitable organization that fixes up things for the underprivileged and helps all over the world.  Lets kill some of them huh?  Yea, sounds like a good idea.

 

Bear falls safely from tree after police tranquilized it (PHOTO)

While the title says it all, you have to see the picture.  It is priceless.

 

Prison Food or School Food?

I had a hard time with this one….it all looks so….so….well…..you have to decide.

 

Now folks here is the poll, answer and be helpful.

This poll isn't going to end until I get some input!

Is the CFBTN flailing like a drowning rat and should it be put down?

View Results

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Have a great Memorial Day Weekend.

-Justin

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Railing at Mother Nature…What a Bitch.

 Posted by at 11:02  Coot Law, Down with, rants
Feb 232015
 
Utah in the United States

You can't miss Utah

The weather in Utah is legendary for changing at a moments notice.  Ok maybe not legendary, but at least known to the public here.  Give it a minute the weather will change is a mantra we live by in the spring.

So When this post was written we had just finished a day of heavy rains.  The weather forecast said it was going to be partly cloudy and warmer.  I washed a load of towels to hang outside on the line.  Just getting ready to hang them out, and it starts raining.  I am sure mother nature was just thwarting me.

I had a few choice things to say to Nature at that point.  I kind of wanted to be Captain Dan in Forrest Gump screaming at the storm.  But, I had kids at home.

There will be another snowstorm, that is almost guaranteed.  Except it will be 80 this weekend and I have to get the lawn mower out before the jungle sets in.  My Great Grandpa, who had a garden that should have been on a magazine, always said, “Don’t plant anything until after Mother’s Day.”  That is sage advice here, because you will just get your tomatoes growing and it will freeze.  It just does here.

I have never been disappointed with that advice, even with pressure from my wife a few times becasue the weather was nice.  Didn’t plant, didn’t get frozen.  So, do you all have some interesting weather thwarting stories to share with us?  I would really like to hear them.  You can’t beat Mother Nature completely but you may be able to slap some sense into her once in a while.  Well, probably not.

Have a great Weekend.

-Justin

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Down with Travel

 Posted by at 11:02  Down with
Feb 232015
 

This will be short

and too the point today because it’s that time again. This Coot is getting ready to travel. You would think that I’d be an old hand by now with the amount of traveling we have done in the past two years. You would be wrong. I’m old but it seems that each trip is just as unsettling as the last. When we started I worried about what I didn’t know about traveling. These days I worry about what I do know. You just can’t win.

What I do know is that traveling sure beats staying home and twiddling your thumbs watching reruns of Law and Order. Some people get upset at the cramped airplane seats and terrible food. I just grin and bear it. I finally got my Doctor to give me something to make me sleep.

peru

Just one of the fabulous sights in Peru.

We’ve had out share of disasters. I’ve been robbed and pick pocketed multiple times. My wife left her passport on the plane. We’ve waited hours for buses that never came and taken the wrong direction from time to time. Somehow it all worked out. Have I learned any lessons? Definitely. Have I learned how to do better? The jury is still out.

So Friday,

my wife and I set out for Peru on a four city marathon. Our past trips were all one city stays but Peru seemed to demand a more complicated trip. We start with a few days in Lima and then fly to the Sacred Valley and Machu Picchu. Then on to high altitude Cuzco and finally to the beach at Huanchaca. The complexity of the arrangements is daunting- well maybe I exaggerate. We have it all booked. What could possibly go wrong?

Maybe I’ll post some pictures on the trip. Maybe I won’t. Everyplace we are staying claims to have internet. Stay tuned.

Hola! Cascarrabias Fochas Antiguo

 Posted by at 11:02  Plain 'ol Cantankerous
Feb 232015
 

Hablo un poco de Espanol.

This old coot is counting down the days.  It’s not the days until November 6 and the Presidential Election.  It’s not the days until Veteran’s Day.  And it’s not the days until Thanksgiving.  I’m counting down to December 4 when my wife and I travel across the Mason Dixon line to Houston, Texas and then on across the equator to Sunny Argentina.  Vamos al Buenos Aires!

The Argentine Flag

I can’t say for sure that the heading above translates as Hello! Cantankerous Old Coots.  My Spanish lessons so far only confirm Hola.  I don’t believe that Google would lie but I understand that there are subtleties that might escape on-line translations so if I said something I shouldn’t, dame un pase.

This trip we aim to function passably in Spanish.  In Italy, we just pointed or waited for someone to speak English.  In Argentina we intend to engage.  I have to say that learning Spanish by listening is muy bueno. The one problem is that I have no idea what some of the words look like in print and the sounds I mimic don’t correspond to the way we say those letters in English.  I may be able to converse but the printed word may turn out to be a complete mystery.  Qué desastre!

Still we are excited.  We hear that Buenos Aires is called the Paris of South American and the pictures we find on the web seem to confirm.  My wife will be busy taking pictures while I absorb the culture and drink mate.  Will I find anything to be cantankerous about?  Que sas!   Will I miss the dreary Winter weather in Sacramento?  No en su vida.

Tropical Christmas!

We will be arriving in Summer for the Southern hemisphere; December is equivalent to July up here and temperatures will be in the 90’s with humidity.  This suggests that we will celebrate siesta during midday even though it is apparently not so endemic in Argentina as some other countries.  We don’t have definite plans and no big urgency like we might have on a 5 day trip.  I have always wanted to take a vacation where I could actually take a day off instead of rushing from one place to another.  Como un pollo con su cabeza cortada.

Still there is work to do.

Meanwhile, during the countdown there are details to arrange.  For the Venice trip I reached a near panic state during the last week.  It was completely irrational and totally unnecessary but I just couldn’t turn off the worrying about imaginary problems.  Right now I’m convinced that I’ll be fine when the countdown gets close but who knows.  Argentina is not Italy.  Buenos Aires is not Venice.  United Airlines is not Iberia.  My wife may have to knock me out just like last time.

I still have Spanish lessons to complete, cell phones (or Argentine sim cards) to arrange, and details like airport transportation and getting Pesos before we go.  And then, of course, we need to book Tango lessons.  So much to do.  Tan poco tiempo.

 

A Coot hits the road!

 Posted by at 11:02  Uncategorized
Feb 232015
 

Hola Coots!

The pressure is mounting.  Tomorrow my wife and I leave rainy Sacramento for sunny and warm Buenos Aires.  We’ve never been to Argentina and we’ve never taken a trip longer than two weeks so there is plenty of room for anxiety.  There is the fear of over packing.  This trip we want to take only what we need after over packing last time.  The alternative might just be under packing.  What is the right amount of clothing?  I don’t know.  I’ll probably get it wrong this time too.  The one nice thing is that summer in Argentina means no need to take a heavy coat.

Then there is the electronics.  Modern travel  requires a computer, my wife’s iPad, telephones, cameras and all the connections, power supplies and batteries to keep them operating.  The apartment has wifi so we can connect on the web and talk via Skype.  We did pretty well last trip where the only thing forgotten was a charger for a camera.  It wasn’t a serious problem.  Camera chargers are found everywhere tourists flock.  This afternoon we will set out all the equipment for packing and make sure that it all is there.

The only loose end this time is our cellphones.  For the last trip we rented them.  This time we intend to use our regular cell phones which we unlocked and buy local prepaid sim cards.  This is more adventurous and will tax our limited Spanish but it is cheaper and provides us with local Argentine telephone numbers.  The downside is that it can’t be done until we get to Argentina and apparently there is a 24 hour delay after buying the card before you get your number and the possibility of dealing with customer service in Spanish.  We will be testing our Pimsleur Spanish.  One thing we learned is that we won’t go hungry or thirsty because it seems that the Spanish word for bar is bar and the Spanish word for sandwich is sandwich.  We can build on that.

We anticipate that there will be some problems as we settle into Buenos Aires for a month but we are making our entrance as simple as possible.  For about the same price as a taxi from the airport, you can arrange for a driver.  So when we make it out of customs at the airport there will be someone standing with a sign that has my name on it.  He will lead us to our transportation which will drive us to meet the apartment agent who will settle us into our home for the next month.   We could have hassled the trip like a native but after a long flight, who needs more stress?

Once we have our home base, it will be time to check out the neighborhood, buy some provisions and those sim cards and try our Spanish (or as they say in Argentina- our Castillano).  I can’t promise regular posting during this trip but the plan is to show some pictures once a week with observations about interesting and quirky things I discover.  Stay tuned.

For a taste of Buenos Aires, check out this video.

 

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