- Cover of When Harry Met Sally
I was in a superb mood. Really, truly, fantastic. Evil plans were coming together nicely, I had plans for the weekend, college was going ok and the parts for my computer were on their way. Unfortunately I was also near the end of a film; ‘When Harry met Sally’ if we’re being specific.
It’s important to note that my choice in this was limited, I had to watch that movie as homework for my college course. Sure I had a choice of days on which to watch it but I had to before the end of the week. Not that I mind the movie – in fact, throughout most of it the dialogue was beautifully written and well executed.
Who am I kidding, the dialogue was brilliant until the very end.
However it still suffers from the one flaw in almost every romantic comedy every (almost added for the simple fact that I’ve not seen all of them in existence and therefore cannot say ‘every’). The happily ever after.
Now I’m female (obviously), I get the whole desire for things to work out nicely at the end with sugar on top. For years I loved it and wanted nothing more than to see it end well. When I found my own ‘Prince charming’ (he would laugh at that) I still enjoyed the movies but there was an added smugness about it; almost like you’d joined some secret club.
Fast forward a few years and I can’t stand them any more. Not because I lost my prince, but because reality decided to smack us around a bit. There is no ‘happily ever after’ that carries on forever and ever amen, at least, never as its portrayed in films. Worse, if you’ve ever had it, seeing films where it remains that way can throw up all sorts of negative emotions you neither asked for nor needed.
Maybe I’m just not their target market any more. Obviously young, female, and realistic don’t gel well with their audience. Or maybe I’m just being overly sensitive about this whole thing (it’s been known to happen), but you have to wonder what the actual goal of these movies is.
We’re fed them from when we’re really young. Much of our ideas about life and love come from the traditional model displayed in these films (Disney too now I think about it, but come on, its Disney). We grow up thinking on some level that we’ll be swept off our feet, lifted out of whatever mess we’re in, and carried off into the sunset where mundane things like paying the bills and living with choices don’t matter. This is never going to happen however to a certain extent we’re brainwashed!
And then when it doesn’t work out with our male counterparts we either ‘hate’ men for a while (in a very upset and irrational way), decide that the poor guy wasn’t ‘the one’ (really?), or think that we’ve done something wrong and hope, maybe for a long time, that he’ll come back. How exactly does that help anyone?
I’m all for inspiring hope but surely it should be hope in something that may actually happen. Causing misery so widespread that ‘chicks cry at romantic movies’ is a social norm shouldn’t be right. And yes, some girls cry because they’re so happy and in fact there’s a whole host of reasons. I still don’t think all those years of watching movies like that and wishing did me, or anyone else for that matter, any good.
What I’d like to know is just how badly this affects the male side of the population? Oh, and for any of the fairer sex out there (yes, I hate that phrase too), am I nuts?
