I witnessed a phenomenon in Wal-Mart tonight. Maybe it was just Wal-Mart but there was a lady (term loosely used entirely based on gender and not the language) who was walking with a cart full of kids down the main aisle. A guy with a couple of kids himself came out from a crossing aisle in front of her. He said “Oh Sorry” as he got out of her way. She replied with a few explicatives and “Fine just run over me!”
Now, you may be wondering what cantankerous lesson this could yield. Well it is not the attitude of the woman, entirely. She was what Ralph has referred to as an Angry Old Fart in this post. Now, what the man did was not cantankerous. It was not even, well, very manly.
He meekly said, “I didn’t.” to the womans back as she was stalking away. Now, the cantankerousness is available. It should be used. This situation left the woman, who was in the wrong (not by being a woman but by being a pain in the ass) with a feeling of superiority and self satisfaction.
I felt sorry for the guy and if I would have had a coots business card I would have given him the first 5 lessons at Coots University for free(it’s called foreshadowing kids, look it up), just to help this poor guy get his balls back from his wifes purse and be a man damnit!
I believe the correct response should have been something along the lines of, “You didn’t mind it last night!” or “Watch where you’re driving that stupid shopping cart you cow!” Or even just “Same to you!” followed by a rude gesture or explosion of flatulence.
We are getting way too pacified people! We let those few who think they are in charge brow beat the rest of us into giving in. We let the medical community push us around under pretenses of patient confidentiality when it is all just a sham. Why should people get away with being rude in any store when someone apologizes.
Sure, if you shop at all, there will be a moment when you step in front of someone or cut someone off or even walk out of an aisle too fast and nearly hit someone. A polite “excuse me” or “sorry” should be sufficient to not make a federal case out of it. Of course, there are those who want to push.
To them you can only respond with a “Same to you!” or “The sun seems to be going down would you mind bending over seeings as how the light shines from your ass?”
Take a stand. Be a real person and not one of the faceless automatons who gives in to people who are louder or are seemingly more forceful. Don’t just do what the nancy boys over in legal tell you you must do. A coot says what he or she thinks. A coot sticks to that. Like we have said before, a true Coot will give the deserving party the Mapquest directions straight to Hell without passing go.
Quit being a ninny.
Watch for a huge, large, big, fantastic, stupendous, unprecedented announcement concerning this site. Stay tuned for more.
-Justin
Justin is the young Coot with a Cantankerous Soul who continues to be educated by older, more cootish Ralph and Bob. His Cantankerosity is his own.
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