Feb 232015
 

limericksI have to confess that I have always loved limericks.  I like the rhythm, the way you can play with the accent and push near rhymes.  Finally I love the way that limericks are never serious.  Nobody would ever write a love poem in limerick form.  So when I sat down to compose a cantankerous post for today, my mind drifted and before you know it I was creating limericks.   They aren’t masterpieces but I modestly claim them as adequate.  Comments are appreciated as are any of your own limericks to complement this post.

Cantankerosity

So cantankerous was Bobby Jim,
with a physiognomy so grim
That he barely could smile
To mask  lying and guile
Causing folks to stay distant from him.

Facebook

Winning friends is the call of the day
Influencing them – making them stay
Dale Carnegie’s dictum
In extremis is sick-dom
Facebook friendships make Dale’s seem passe.

Middle Age Spread

Tim was lean, mean and fit- a role model
of healthy prime manhood , no twaddle,
But his appetite grew
’till his belt buckle blew
Now his swagger has turned to a waddle.

Feelings! Whose Feelings?

 Posted by at 11:02  principles
Feb 232015
 
A teddy bear named Tommy.

Image via Wikipedia

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.

Oscar Wilde

Bob is inspirational.

I’ve been inspired today with our task of exploring the sensitive topic of feelings. Bob was very eloquent in stating that there are some areas of life where feelings just can’t be considered. Life is no cakewalk. Eggs have to be broken and some things are more important than feelings. I wouldn’t attempt of challenge Bob because first of all he outweighs me by 75 pounds and second he is friends with all the judges and elected officials in his community.

Well said Bob!

Still, sometimes, you need  finesse.

But  I like to think that I can add a little finesse and sophistication to the conversation. And I would like to counter the negative slant of Bob’s argument with a positive one. My suggestion for today is that somebody’s feelings are the perfect lever to mess with their mind and leave them slack jawed, dazed and confused.  And to enhance your own feelings.

Feelings are irrational

Nobody can explain why we love kittens and hate snakes or why we happily squash cockroaches but swerve to avoid hitting a bunny. It is easier to understand that we love the sound of our own name and are suckers for flattery. Some of the strongest feelings we have are those of self-love, deluded though they might be.

Which reminds me about the Coots Lessons

I can’t help but be reminded of the series of Coots Lessons here at Cantankerous Old Coots. Some of you may have forgotten those lessons -or worse never learned them. At the core of those lessons is one over riding concept: don’t let the feelings you imagine for anyone else cause you to deviate from your own  principles. First of all, who are you to read their minds and know their thoughts and second, why in heaven’s name would you care?

Coots see the world clearly

Being a Coot means that you have a clear vision of the world you live in and your purpose in it and in case you are confused this means that you are not concerned about what anybody else thinks. You have enough problems of your own. Let them handle theirs!

Let’s review those first five lessons

In case you need a refresher, here is a brief summary of the first five Coots’ Lessons (incidentally available for your own e-library is our beautifully designed E-Book which you can have free of charge when you join our mailing list with all the other cool guys). Coots in training should review these lessons periodically anyway.

Coot Lesson #1 – Let it out!

“Here at Cantankerous Old Coots we believe in letting your feelings out. Maybe your mother taught you to be nice. She may have told you “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” Well, we say forget what your mother said. How far has your mother’s advice got you anyway. We say, if you feel it, then let it out.”

Coot Lesson #2 – We Don’t Care What You Think

“Here at Coots, your opinion is worthless. If we wanted it, we would ask but we don’t have time to waste arguing about it. It’s a free country for now but every second we get pushed further and further into a world where we can’t say something because somebody else thinks different and we might offend them.”

Coot Lesson #3 – Polite is over rated!

“Polite is a synonym for lie. If you don’t set these people straight, they will continue to inflict their shoddy goods on other unsuspecting victims. If they believe you they will have your encouragement to do it. If they don’t believe you, they brand you either as a fool or liar.”

Coot Lesson 4- Say It When You Feel It!

“Lose that internal filter that clogs up with what you “should” say, and just say what you mean.  It may anger people but shooting straight is the best way to deal with society as a whole.  Keep your lies and your equivocations; quit pandering to people who don’t really mean anything to you.”

Coot Lesson 5- Let your face show what you think.

“Your expression must support and reinforce everything you have learned so far. It must be stern and serious. It can run the gamut of emotions from scowl to downright contempt. It must take no prisoners, leave no stone unturned and be so controlled that no one can have any doubt that you mean exactly what you are saying.”

Stand up for your own feelings!

So forget about other people’s feelings and stand up for your own. That is the position of Cantankerous Old Coots and we think that the world would be a better place if everybody lived by that stand. Review the Coots Lessons and make the world a better place. Whose feelings are more important anyway?

Feb 232015
 

Another week of 2012 down the drain, February almost at an end, where is it all going?  Well Bob is off on his quest to be the go to guy for wordpress video blogging, and Ralph is getting ready to be either an Italian, or an American lost in Italy.  So that leaves me, riding a stumbling pony around the Cantankerous Old Coots stable.

So with all of the lack of discipline and lack of posts from me it will either be a ghost town of old promoted posts or I will get back into the good saddle and write like I used to when this whole blogging thing got going.

I am inspecting my girth strap as we speak.  Posts will be new and fresh, hopefully they will be interesting.

Have a great Trip Ralph, make your wife think she is more important than blogging for a while….

Bob, well,  I don’t know.

See you all on Wednesday.

-Justin

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Feb 232015
 

We don’t care what you think.

Your mother may think you are clever and dote on your every word. You may have been brainwashed in our worthless education system to think that you have value just for breathing. You may even be a pillar in your community, a church elder, a school teacher or even a politician. In the end it doesn’t matter. Here at Coots, your opinion is worthless. If we wanted it, we would ask but we don’t have time to waste arguing about it. It’s a free country for now but every second we get pushed further and further into a world where we can’t say something because somebody else thinks different and we might offend them. Someone seems to have invented a civil right that makes is a crime to offend someone. While we still can; while there is still no addendum to the Bill of Rights to say that all us Americans have a God given right not to be offended, Coots is going on record to say that we don’t care what you think. You can think whatever stupid things you want. You can be a damn fool for all we care and we are pretty confident that you have everything it takes to be the best damn fool there is. We just don’t care. And we will tell you what a fool you are- as often as we can.

Its’ not easy telling it like it is

You would think that that would make us good guys in today’s feel-good world. It doesn’t seem to work that way. Unless you are Al Gore or the New York Times, society frowns on telling people what you think. Everybody is supposed to be smart enough to make up their own mind today. It is just that making up your own mind is reduced to parroting Al Gore or the New York Times. Being smart and making up your own mind is now nothing more than saying the right things at the right time. Nobody knows how to think for themselves or even that they aren’t thinking at all.

We know what we think

We don’t claim to be smart here at Coots. We don’t read the New York Times and we stay as far away from Al Gore as possible (when you get older, you just don’t like to be where it is cold). We do like to think, however. We think a lot. And when we think a lot we just can’t help blurting it all out. So we will. Disagree if you must. You can even add a comment to voice your disagreement. You can shout. You can scream. You can throw a tantrum. But in the end, we don’t care. We just don’t care what you think. We don’t care if you are offended. In fact, we hope you are. Somebody needs to straighten you out.