Once Upon a Time…

 Posted by at 11:02  Podcast, principles, Up With
Feb 232015
 

Hello folks.  It seems that there has been quite a resurgence of fairy tales lately on the old Television.  NBC and ABC are both putting up some dark fairy tale inspired shows.  But I will tell you something today that is not a fairy tale.

Veterans Day

Image via Wikipedia

Freedom.  It may sound like an ethereal concept to some but it is real, and here, the coots celebrate the freedom that we have to get on and rant.  If you haven’t noticed already, today is November 11th.  Besides some movie releases, today is also Veterans Day.

So from the coots, happy Veterans Day!  If you have served these United States at any time, thank you for your service.  Thank you for allowing us to keep the freedom that lets us write a silly blog like this one without worrying if the government is going to kick in the door and shoot one of us.  Bob may disagree with this, but that is his show to rant on.

If you are currently serving somewhere far from home, or even keeping the peace stateside, we thank you as well.  We spend a couple of holidays honoring those in the military: Memorial Day for those who paid for our freedom with their lives, and Veterans Day for those who made it home.  I like to add those currently serving to Veterans Day, they will be vets soon enough.

VETERANS DAY CEREMONY 2009 - US ARMY AFRICA - ...

Image by US Army Africa via Flickr

Last year I had a Veterans Day Podcast, you can listen to it here.  My sentiments have not changed.

So you may not be able to go to the bank and you don’t get mail, while you are railing against those facts, remember that it was brave men and women who allow you to get that mail and go to the bank anyway.

Go out and thank a Vet today.  That is Veteran not Veterinarian.  Fly your American flag proudly.  At 11AM  take a moment of silence to honor all of those who have made our country great, from the cooks and secretaries, to the Admirals and Generals who get all of the press.

Thank you Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for our freedom.

If you are a Vet, please leave us a comment below we would love to hear from you.

If you are here reading this, Vet or not, please use the share buttons below and promote this post and get our feelings out there to the internet.

Thanks for reading.

-Justin

Related articles
Continue reading »

Down with lazy, no good, non-writing buggers.

 Posted by at 11:02  Coot Smirk, Down with, Plain 'ol Cantankerous, principles
Feb 232015
 

This post is about me. It is about ineptitude, insolence and laziness. I couldn’t think of another “i” word that meant laziness. I could have looked it up but that would defeat the purpose of laziness.

There's A Fine Line between Rest and Laziness

There’s A Fine Line between Rest and Laziness (Photo credit: SaraiRachel)

For a long time, Ralph has been at the head of this site.  For reasons known to the Universe and the laws of B.S., Bob and I have been largely absent.  Bob has an excuse, he is Bob.  I could come up with excuses too, but they all boil down to laziness.  You know the old saying, “Excuses are like assholes, everybody has one.”

I am not going to sit here and write yet another post saying how I should post more, I am going to try and figure out just what should be done to the lazy good for nothings who go and start a site and then don’t do anything with it.

Drawing and quartering seems a bit harsh.  flogging?  Maybe.  Turn the whole damn thing over to Ralph? Nah, that is the sure way to lose all control.  So, I will write a Down with post.  It is now April and the showers are starting here in Utah.

What does that have to do with writing?  Nothing.  Just a random thought.  What do I need to do about posting?  That is the question.  The Coots has existed to try and bring a modicum of reality to the web.  We seek to enlighten this generation about being yourself, and just letting things go.  We even have tried to get you all to join us for Cantankerous Lessons.  None of that has worked.  I do hope Bob is getting some traction on his podcasts, they are actually quite good, and guaranteed to make you feel at least something.

I am working on yet another iteration of the old Cantankerous Old Coots podcast myself.  But, I don’t know that people would be interested in hearing me bitch and moan about the world, even though it works for Bob.  What I would like to do is have guests.  People who would be interested in joining myself and maybe even Ralph and Bob, to talk about the world and this pussy footing, politically correct, sissified country that we are now inhabiting.

I would really like to hear from the hundreds of people that visit this blog each day hoping that Ralph will pull another nugget of cantankerous wisdom out of his ass and make you all smile.  I hope is is not a disappointment when it is Bob or I that graces this page.  If you are interested in joining me for an episode of “The Cantankerosity Sessions”, send me an email or comment below.

I plan on recording the episodes over Skype, unless you happen to live in the Greater Salt Lake area, and then we will still do it over Skype.  You can be a part of history, or at least lost in the endless sea of podcasts that inhabit iTunes.

Imagine now that I am doing the Jedi wave and saying, “You will come and be part of the podcast.  The Coots are your friends, and friends talk about what bugs them.”  Bugs them like lazy, no good, non writing buggers.  Join me.  Be Cantankerous.  The first Cantankerosity Session will hit you next week,  with or without you.

-Justin

Jeremiah Brandreth (1790 – 7 November 1817) wa...

Jeremiah Brandreth (1790 – 7 November 1817) was an out-of-work stocking maker who lived in Sutton-in-Ashfield, Nottinghamshire who was hanged for treason. He was known as “The Nottingham Captain”. He and two of his conspirators were the last people to be beheaded with an axe in Britain (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

Enhanced by Zemanta

Spelling stupid… C-A-D-I-L-L-A-C

 Posted by at 11:02  Coot Comedy, Down with, Plain 'ol Cantankerous
Feb 232015
 
A General Motors LS3 Engine in a 2008 Corvette.

Image via Wikipedia

Are you getting a bit older? I know that Ol Ralph is up there approaching triple digits, and I think Justin is down there in the thirties or so, and I’m kind of stuck here in the middle in my mid fifties, and I think most of our readers are up there in the “second childhood” area. Some are probably like me, just never bothering to grow up. Others are likely like Ralph, suffering from old-timers disease.

Regardless of how you find yourself getting to your second childhood, you are probably ready for a grownup toy.

Boy, has Cadillac got your number. It’s a stupid toy, but it definitely falls into the bracket of “big boys’ toys” while giving mama something (stupid) to play with as well.

Cadillac decided to crossbreed station wagons and Corvettes. Now, right there ya gotta get the idea just how stupid the idea of this car is. I don’t care if the station wagon and the corvette get married or not, the result is still going to be a bastard.

You would think General Motors would learn. The corvette itself is a bastard child of an ill conceived crossbreed. Chevrolet got the idea that they could cross the sportiness of a true sports car with the luxury that soft-assed Americans were used to …and the Corvette was born. It was too heavy and lumbering to be a sports car, and too small and tight fitting to be a luxury car. The fact that it’s been so popular for 50 years is a tribute to American Advertising, the gullibility of the American buyer, or both.

Well, apparently General Motors is counting on American stupidity and good advertising to come through for them again.

The new car is a station wagon (Doh!) With a 500 plus horsepower Corvette engine. It will accelerate from zero to 60 miles per hour in 4 seconds, and has a top speed of (Holy speeding ticket, Batman!)…are you ready for this?… 190 miles per hour. In a Cadillac. Station wagon. Probably with a “Baby on Board” window dangly thing in the back window. And junior strapped to his car seat.

The price tag is north of $70,000.

Why do I give a rats ass, and why should you? Because we, you and I, now own General Motors, and I don’t think Madison Avenue is going to get as lucky this time.

Oh well, at least it will be good for the hot mamas that wind up with one. Maybe their snotty brats will quit complaining about being picked up from school in a station wagon.

 

Related articles

Down with Parties and all they entail.

 Posted by at 11:02  Down with, rants
Feb 232015
 
North America at night - Satellite image - Pla...

Image by PlanetObserver via Flickr

What the???? It is already Friday?  Wow where did the week go.  Now, I know the title of this post is going to make people think I am jumping on Bob’s political bandwagon and talking about Political parties but I am not that sophisticated.  The parties I speak of are actual parties, with people invading your house and spilling punch on the rug, kids who drop cake on the floor and that rogue ice cream cone you find the next day on your nice table and are just thankful that it is on the marble part and not the wood part.

Yes, parties can suck.  They sound like a good idea but they are entirely too much work for me.  Plus there are people coming over and judging you to the enth degree and looking down on your decisions and…well that is just my parents.  If you haven’t guessed by now, we are going to have a party on Saturday.  I am not looking forward to it.

Party may be a stretch to say, but a reception with cake and punch ends up being the same thing.  And family will be there.  Some of which we haven’t had any contact with for months.  Some who should have at least called during the turmoil of the past couple of months.  But enough about my Father.  It will be interesting to say the least.

See, my son is getting baptized into our church on Saturday and this is one thing that I don’t think Grandpa will miss.  Birthday’s and major catastrophe’s are not important enough but this just may be.  We will have to see.  I may have another great post for next week all about it.  Monday may be interesting around here.

On a side note to that, Bob has found that his video posts are very time consuming and he has way too much life to live over the weekend to not stay up all Sunday night getting a post ready.  He will be moving his videos to Tuesday.  I think I have finally figured out what to do with my podcasts as well.  I now have a garage and I am going to build me a little studio in there to go hide   record in.  I am going to shoot for next week on Thursday for a podcast!  Just audio though, I still am just lukewarm on video.

On another disjointed side note Pink Floyd is not bad for writing too.  Throw on “The Wall” and start a rant….not bad.  And I am not even on anything…..

So back to parties.  They sound like a good idea but I think I would rather go to a party than host one.  Leave my house alone and save your derision for someone else.  It is easy on the net to let things roll off of your back.  It is easy to dismiss any evil that is given to you via email or a comment.  It is another to sit in relative silence and deal with the eye rolls and nauseated yet sarcastic phrases that are spat out.

I have respect for my elders and I will always respect my Father for being my father.  I just don’t want to talk to him right now.  I am hoping that he doesn’t show up, but that is a horrible thing for him not to be to his Grandson’s big event.  I am afraid that there will be a shouting match and more people than should will end up in tears.

What a $#@&ed up situation.  In general, take your parties and count me out, I don’t need the stress.  I had better make sure my migraine pills are handy.

For all of you, have a good weekend, or go to hell.  I don’t know that I care right now.

See you next week.

-Justin

 

Related articles

CNS for September 18, 2011

 Posted by at 11:02  Uncategorized
Feb 232015
 
Double Double Animal Style

Happiness is a hot cheeseburger!

Well, it’s finally here. Today is National Cheesburger Day. What could possible be happier than a sizzling burger dripping with juices and smothered with cheese. I’m salivating just thinking about it. Naturally something as good as a cheesburger was invented in the USA by good old Americans. You know it’s good because you can find cheesburgers anywhere you go these days, not even McDonalds can damage the cheeseburger mystique. So wherever you are today and whatever you have planned, just drop everything and get yourself a cheeseburger. Maybe you want a bargain burger for 25 cents or a have it your way and pull out all the stops burger. Maybe you go fast food with a Big Mac or made to order with a Double Double. It makes no difference. Get yourself a mouthfullo of happiness and celebrate the miracle that is a cheeseburger.

And what to have with your cheeseburger?  Most of us enjoy an order of fries with our cheeseburger but these days it isn’t so easy. If you want fries with that you are going to need parental approval.

Michelle Obama to join Olive Garden announcement

And, of course nothing goes better with your cheeseburger than a coke.  Even without the fries that cheeseburger is a mouthwatering delight. Add a coke and your tastebud just cry out in pleasure. Could you be any happier? The answer is, of course, yes you can and Coca Cola wants to prove it with this video.

W+K’s fifth ‘Happiness Factory’ spot is a six-minute musical spectacle

If you haven’t developed diabetes by now, there is just one more bit of happiness for yon today. The great wall of Tujunga has been restored to its original glory.

Video: The Great Wall mural in the Tujunga Wash in Valley Glen gets a facelift

So there is no excuse for anybody to be unhappy on National Cheeseburger Day.  Next week will surely be harder.

 Older Entries  Newer Entries