I am a Giant Waster of Time

 Posted by at 11:02  Plain 'ol Cantankerous, principles, rants
Feb 232015
 
Angry Birds

Angry Birds (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Before you start thinking that this title means something deep or is a description of my character in World of Warcraft (do they still play that? I don’t.)  it isn’t.  This title is the truth.  I am sure this topic has been covered and you are most likely to click off of this post and leave the Coots site right now.  But hold on a second, you need to be logged in for a few more seconds for it to count.  Really Hang on.  Just a bit longer.

Have you ever noticed those videos over in the sidebar?  How about clicking on our personal blog sites?  maybe Facebook?  Click that link and head to Amazon.com and get yourself something nice and we can make a couple of pennies.  Ok are you good?  See what I did, I just took something normal and easy and managed to waste a bunch of time doing it.

You know, I am fairly good at it as well.  If I actually spent half the time writing as I do screwing around I would be able to say I write for hours and hours every day.  Unfortunately, I don’t seem to have that luxury.

I can spend time doing crap that doesn’t mean anything and why?  Am I afraid of the actual writing? No.  I usually justify it by saying if I start to write something I will just get interrupted and my wife will need something so I may as well not bother.  Before you know it Netflix and Angry Birds are calling you from that seductive corner of your computer.

I try to leave the computer completely but then my kindle beckons with that book I am having a hard time putting down….Damn, I should have washed some underwear instead.  I need more sleep.  Now the discussion needs to shift towards what needs to be done about it?  I think I have proven that the “Just Write” argument is out the window…gotta kill some pigs.

Cerebral Cortex location

Cerebral Cortex location (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There is just a niggling in the back of my cerebral cortex that says I can’t do this same old same old anymore.  We are heading to Florida in June and I thought this morning, “Well I guess I will just neglect the blogs some more” while I am gone.  and then, “No!  I can pre write some posts!”  and then, “Yea right, I can’t write the regular ones.”  That in turn inspired this post.

So I am going to reward myself when I write something by being able to shut off that damn Adele song for more than 10 minutes.  The wife got a hold of that song and the kids play it and she plays it and the radio plays it and it never seems to get out of the *explicitve deleted* repeat loop!

But I digress….how do you fellow monkeys fight the urges that keep is from doing actual work?  How do you more efficiently waste time so that you can still work?  Inquiring minds want to know….and if you remember that you are as old as me….

-Justin

PS. The podcast is going to be revived on this blog very soon.  If anyone has an idea about something you want to hear about or want to be a guest, let me know.

I am thinking of using a new format and maybe a “What can the Coots be Cantankerous about”  much like the “What can’t Adam Complain about” segment on the Adam Carolla Podcast.

Give me some topics…and vote for Ralph in the CNS leader poll already.  His fragile ego can’t handle one lonely vote.  And I don’t want to write the CNS any more than I have too.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Justin

Justin is the young Coot with a Cantankerous Soul who continues to be educated by older, more cootish Ralph and Bob. His Cantankerosity is his own.

More Posts - Website - Twitter - Facebook

Lookee here…see what Obama built!

 Posted by at 11:02  Bob's Politics, principles, videos
Feb 232015
 

President Obama enjoyed telling us that we “…didn’t build that!” Despite that, I think it only fair that we give credit where credit is due. That means that when Obama does something…when he builds something…we ought to give him credit for

English: Photograph of Iman Crosson holding ne...

whatever it is he built.

In today’s video I am more than happy to give him credit…full credit…for his construction skills. Let’s take a look at just what Obama HAS Continue reading »

Bob@HayleStorm Interactive

Bob comes to us with a skeptical attitude and a full cup of Cantankerousness. He also writes about homesteading and yurts over at JuicyMaters.com and rants about politics at Common-Sense-Conversation.com Most of the time, though, you'll find him at HayleStorm.net, cranking out great websites for clients OR writing tutorials teaching them to build their own sites.

More Posts - Website - Twitter

Once Upon a Time…

 Posted by at 11:02  Podcast, principles, Up With
Feb 232015
 

Hello folks.  It seems that there has been quite a resurgence of fairy tales lately on the old Television.  NBC and ABC are both putting up some dark fairy tale inspired shows.  But I will tell you something today that is not a fairy tale.

Veterans Day

Image via Wikipedia

Freedom.  It may sound like an ethereal concept to some but it is real, and here, the coots celebrate the freedom that we have to get on and rant.  If you haven’t noticed already, today is November 11th.  Besides some movie releases, today is also Veterans Day.

So from the coots, happy Veterans Day!  If you have served these United States at any time, thank you for your service.  Thank you for allowing us to keep the freedom that lets us write a silly blog like this one without worrying if the government is going to kick in the door and shoot one of us.  Bob may disagree with this, but that is his show to rant on.

If you are currently serving somewhere far from home, or even keeping the peace stateside, we thank you as well.  We spend a couple of holidays honoring those in the military: Memorial Day for those who paid for our freedom with their lives, and Veterans Day for those who made it home.  I like to add those currently serving to Veterans Day, they will be vets soon enough.

VETERANS DAY CEREMONY 2009 - US ARMY AFRICA - ...

Image by US Army Africa via Flickr

Last year I had a Veterans Day Podcast, you can listen to it here.  My sentiments have not changed.

So you may not be able to go to the bank and you don’t get mail, while you are railing against those facts, remember that it was brave men and women who allow you to get that mail and go to the bank anyway.

Go out and thank a Vet today.  That is Veteran not Veterinarian.  Fly your American flag proudly.  At 11AM  take a moment of silence to honor all of those who have made our country great, from the cooks and secretaries, to the Admirals and Generals who get all of the press.

Thank you Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for our freedom.

If you are a Vet, please leave us a comment below we would love to hear from you.

If you are here reading this, Vet or not, please use the share buttons below and promote this post and get our feelings out there to the internet.

Thanks for reading.

-Justin

Related articles
Continue reading »

Justin

Justin is the young Coot with a Cantankerous Soul who continues to be educated by older, more cootish Ralph and Bob. His Cantankerosity is his own.

More Posts - Website - Twitter - Facebook

Down with lazy, no good, non-writing buggers.

 Posted by at 11:02  Coot Smirk, Down with, Plain 'ol Cantankerous, principles
Feb 232015
 

This post is about me. It is about ineptitude, insolence and laziness. I couldn’t think of another “i” word that meant laziness. I could have looked it up but that would defeat the purpose of laziness.

There's A Fine Line between Rest and Laziness

There’s A Fine Line between Rest and Laziness (Photo credit: SaraiRachel)

For a long time, Ralph has been at the head of this site.  For reasons known to the Universe and the laws of B.S., Bob and I have been largely absent.  Bob has an excuse, he is Bob.  I could come up with excuses too, but they all boil down to laziness.  You know the old saying, “Excuses are like assholes, everybody has one.”

I am not going to sit here and write yet another post saying how I should post more, I am going to try and figure out just what should be done to the lazy good for nothings who go and start a site and then don’t do anything with it.

Drawing and quartering seems a bit harsh.  flogging?  Maybe.  Turn the whole damn thing over to Ralph? Nah, that is the sure way to lose all control.  So, I will write a Down with post.  It is now April and the showers are starting here in Utah.

What does that have to do with writing?  Nothing.  Just a random thought.  What do I need to do about posting?  That is the question.  The Coots has existed to try and bring a modicum of reality to the web.  We seek to enlighten this generation about being yourself, and just letting things go.  We even have tried to get you all to join us for Cantankerous Lessons.  None of that has worked.  I do hope Bob is getting some traction on his podcasts, they are actually quite good, and guaranteed to make you feel at least something.

I am working on yet another iteration of the old Cantankerous Old Coots podcast myself.  But, I don’t know that people would be interested in hearing me bitch and moan about the world, even though it works for Bob.  What I would like to do is have guests.  People who would be interested in joining myself and maybe even Ralph and Bob, to talk about the world and this pussy footing, politically correct, sissified country that we are now inhabiting.

I would really like to hear from the hundreds of people that visit this blog each day hoping that Ralph will pull another nugget of cantankerous wisdom out of his ass and make you all smile.  I hope is is not a disappointment when it is Bob or I that graces this page.  If you are interested in joining me for an episode of “The Cantankerosity Sessions”, send me an email or comment below.

I plan on recording the episodes over Skype, unless you happen to live in the Greater Salt Lake area, and then we will still do it over Skype.  You can be a part of history, or at least lost in the endless sea of podcasts that inhabit iTunes.

Imagine now that I am doing the Jedi wave and saying, “You will come and be part of the podcast.  The Coots are your friends, and friends talk about what bugs them.”  Bugs them like lazy, no good, non writing buggers.  Join me.  Be Cantankerous.  The first Cantankerosity Session will hit you next week,  with or without you.

-Justin

Jeremiah Brandreth (1790 – 7 November 1817) wa...

Jeremiah Brandreth (1790 – 7 November 1817) was an out-of-work stocking maker who lived in Sutton-in-Ashfield, Nottinghamshire who was hanged for treason. He was known as “The Nottingham Captain”. He and two of his conspirators were the last people to be beheaded with an axe in Britain (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

Enhanced by Zemanta

Justin

Justin is the young Coot with a Cantankerous Soul who continues to be educated by older, more cootish Ralph and Bob. His Cantankerosity is his own.

More Posts - Website - Twitter - Facebook

Feelings! Whose Feelings?

 Posted by at 11:02  principles
Feb 232015
 
A teddy bear named Tommy.

Image via Wikipedia

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.

Oscar Wilde

Bob is inspirational.

I’ve been inspired today with our task of exploring the sensitive topic of feelings. Bob was very eloquent in stating that there are some areas of life where feelings just can’t be considered. Life is no cakewalk. Eggs have to be broken and some things are more important than feelings. I wouldn’t attempt of challenge Bob because first of all he outweighs me by 75 pounds and second he is friends with all the judges and elected officials in his community.

Well said Bob!

Still, sometimes, you need  finesse.

But  I like to think that I can add a little finesse and sophistication to the conversation. And I would like to counter the negative slant of Bob’s argument with a positive one. My suggestion for today is that somebody’s feelings are the perfect lever to mess with their mind and leave them slack jawed, dazed and confused.  And to enhance your own feelings.

Feelings are irrational

Nobody can explain why we love kittens and hate snakes or why we happily squash cockroaches but swerve to avoid hitting a bunny. It is easier to understand that we love the sound of our own name and are suckers for flattery. Some of the strongest feelings we have are those of self-love, deluded though they might be.

Which reminds me about the Coots Lessons

I can’t help but be reminded of the series of Coots Lessons here at Cantankerous Old Coots. Some of you may have forgotten those lessons -or worse never learned them. At the core of those lessons is one over riding concept: don’t let the feelings you imagine for anyone else cause you to deviate from your own  principles. First of all, who are you to read their minds and know their thoughts and second, why in heaven’s name would you care?

Coots see the world clearly

Being a Coot means that you have a clear vision of the world you live in and your purpose in it and in case you are confused this means that you are not concerned about what anybody else thinks. You have enough problems of your own. Let them handle theirs!

Let’s review those first five lessons

In case you need a refresher, here is a brief summary of the first five Coots’ Lessons (incidentally available for your own e-library is our beautifully designed E-Book which you can have free of charge when you join our mailing list with all the other cool guys). Coots in training should review these lessons periodically anyway.

Coot Lesson #1 – Let it out!

“Here at Cantankerous Old Coots we believe in letting your feelings out. Maybe your mother taught you to be nice. She may have told you “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” Well, we say forget what your mother said. How far has your mother’s advice got you anyway. We say, if you feel it, then let it out.”

Coot Lesson #2 – We Don’t Care What You Think

“Here at Coots, your opinion is worthless. If we wanted it, we would ask but we don’t have time to waste arguing about it. It’s a free country for now but every second we get pushed further and further into a world where we can’t say something because somebody else thinks different and we might offend them.”

Coot Lesson #3 – Polite is over rated!

“Polite is a synonym for lie. If you don’t set these people straight, they will continue to inflict their shoddy goods on other unsuspecting victims. If they believe you they will have your encouragement to do it. If they don’t believe you, they brand you either as a fool or liar.”

Coot Lesson 4- Say It When You Feel It!

“Lose that internal filter that clogs up with what you “should” say, and just say what you mean.  It may anger people but shooting straight is the best way to deal with society as a whole.  Keep your lies and your equivocations; quit pandering to people who don’t really mean anything to you.”

Coot Lesson 5- Let your face show what you think.

“Your expression must support and reinforce everything you have learned so far. It must be stern and serious. It can run the gamut of emotions from scowl to downright contempt. It must take no prisoners, leave no stone unturned and be so controlled that no one can have any doubt that you mean exactly what you are saying.”

Stand up for your own feelings!

So forget about other people’s feelings and stand up for your own. That is the position of Cantankerous Old Coots and we think that the world would be a better place if everybody lived by that stand. Review the Coots Lessons and make the world a better place. Whose feelings are more important anyway?

Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

More Posts - Website - Twitter - Facebook

 Older Entries  Newer Entries