Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

CNS for 22 July 2012

 Posted by at 09:52  Headline News
Jul 222012
 

The news this week is a mixed bag.

Interesting but not relevant unless you are a smoker who likes San Francisco or an employee who is sick of being exploited. Hold on there!  Now that I think about it, that’s probably most of us. This week, I think we will start with the least relevant story and work up to a grand crescendo at the end. When’s the last time you found any sea glass?

Sea glass becoming harder to find

raw sea glass to be

Maybe you aren’t a sea glass collector. Maybe you don’t even know what sea glass is. No matter, there is less of it these days, a casualty of modern efficiency in the form of plastic bottles and aluminum cans. Not much is delivered in glass these days and most of the rest is recycled so the raw material for sea glass just doesn’t make it to the sea anymore.

San Francisco gets more schizophrenic by the hour. Still known as the place for wild-eyed hippies, stoner parties and anything goes sex, the city gets more weird and puritanical about minor vices like smoking. Indoor smoking has long been prohibited but now the City Fathers want to ban it outside- unless it is pot smoke, of course.

SF Considers Strict Outdoor Smoking Ban – Except For Medical Pot

Finally, in the ‘news you can use’ category is this story. It turns out that panhandlers make pretty good money. The fringes aren’t good but the with holding is great. Tell me why you continue working 9 to 5.

Panhandler arrested, claims to have made $60,000 last year

Just get the permit and insurance

Even more interesting when you read the story. It seems that the Police are fine with panhandling so long as you have a permit and insurance. Who know that the cops were on their side? Tell me why again we put up with jobs?

The officer told Speegle without a permit and an insurance policy he could not panhandle and gave him a warning to leave, but 20 minutes later the officer reported again seeing Speegle panhandle in the same spot.

So that’s the story from the Coot’s News Service for July 22. Hang in there until next week.

Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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Jul 152012
 

Up with Lifestyle 

Lifestyle is important to Cantankerous Old Coots. We feel like we deserve something for putting up with life for all these years. Aging isn’t all that much fun so we are always on the lookout for enjoyments, even small ones. This week’s stories provide some of those small pleasures.

Demi’s boy toy

Lets start with space. Space was our future when this Coot was a kid. I fully expected colonies on the Moon by the end of the century. I was dreaming.  Back then I didn’t understand government.  Up until the 60’s we were on target with Kennedy leading the charge but after the huge arousal from the Moon landings, NASA went all coitus interruptus on us. All progress stopped and we abandoned the rockets that could get us there.  Man in space was looking like a hopeless wet dream until Sir Richard stepped up to the plate.

Now not only will man be going back to space, it can be you. Sir Richard says that 2013 is when you can purchase a trip to space; no muss, no fuss, no government red tape. Just bring money. This Coot won’t be on the virgin Virgin flight but I’ll be there in spirit and feeling some satisfaction that the dreams of man in space from my youth are coming true- even if it means seeing Ashton Kutcher on board. I wonder what Sir Richard would charge to leave him there?  Maybe Bruce would help.

Branson taking people into space in 2013

This next story is for all you guys that wonder what those $200 bottles of wine taste like and what James Bond knows about wine drinking that you didn’t learn in the backseat of your roommate’s car. I know I’ve never been able to justify paying even $25 for a bottle of wine but I always figured it was just my piss-poor palette that wasn’t refined enough to appreciate a fine wine. Now it seems my palette may not be so piss poor after all.

Is There Really A Taste Difference Between Cheap and Expensive Wines?

English: NYC signing September 1, 2009 at Nint...

English: NYC signing September 1, 2009 at Nintendo Store – New York City, USA (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Finally a story that really doesn’t have much to do with unfulfilled expectations. I never expected much from Justin Bieber and to give him credit he never disappoints. Still the idea of this snot-nosed kid getting adulation from pre-pubescent girls around the world is pretty hard to take. Somebody needs to introduce this kid to the harsh realities of life so it is a small pleasure to see someone trying to take him down.

Woman Sues Justin Bieber for Hearing Loss 

 

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Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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Jul 082012
 

What can be better than a plethora?

Virgin Galactic Scaled Composites 348 White Kn...

Virgin Galactic Scaled Composites 348 White Knight 2 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It’s a mixed bag this week but somehow our crack staff have found a plethora of stories. (It’s hard to know whether the stories this week are better than average or they were just trying to get me to include ‘plethora’ in the text. I have to say that plethora is a grand word with lots of mouth appeal. Just try to say it while frowning.)

The first story is about the new private spacecraft. After the incredible back pedaling from the space frontier by NASA, it’s great to get excited again about space. NASA’s high point was the moon landing and it’s been downhill since. Thanks to Sir Richard and a few other good men, man is going back into space. It’s good timing too because we need the money being wasted by NASA to pay down the debt.

 

The news today is that if you want to see the future of space, the Virgin Galactic spacecraft will be appearing at an airshow. I don’t know where Farnborogh is but this is your chance.

Virgin Galactic spaceship to make Farnborough debut

Moving on to the next story, it may not be spaceflight but did you know that there is a bird that uses it’s wings to make music? This bird isn’t stuck in any ruts. Read and be inspired.

Bird sings by playing its wings like a violin

There is also good news this week. Aren’t you sick of being told you are too fat? Unless you are anorexic somebody is going to tell you to lose weight. If it isn’t your wife, it’s your doctor and now the government spends your money to put ads on television just in case you might have missed the message. Well the truth is always more complicated than the government can handle, let alone your wife. Read this story and have hope along with another donut.

Study: Extra pounds may protect heart failure patients

And finally two stories you many not need to know but if you don’t live in California you may still suffer with the delusion that your government is worth all the taxes you pay for it. California is proof that the more you pay the government the more irresponsible it is. From ridiculous regulations like this:

Overturn California’s Foie Gras Ban

To spending money they don’t have like this:

California high-speed rail gets green light

Just what California needs

These days the only dream Californians have left is to dream that they might be able to sell their house for more than they owe and move someplace with worse weather and better economics like North Dakota.

 

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Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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Jul 012012
 

 

 To the cloud!

English: Breakdown of Cloud Computing Services

English: Breakdown of Cloud Computing Services (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The world today is just too darn complex. There is so much stuff going on that we just don’t understand and depend on. Complex isn’t exactly right either. Today everything is simple. You can be plugged in where ever you are. When I was a kid, only Dick Tracy had a telephone that he could carry around. These days everybody has one. And that phone has more power than the mainframes businesses used back when I started working. I don’t pretend to understand the iphone and although I do own an Android smart phone, I only use it as a calendar. People tell me that I can run spreadsheets on it and create graphics although they never explain why I would want to do these things or how to keep from going blind working on a small screen,

 

There is apparently no limit to what you can do with a mobile phone these days. I am constantly amazed at how completely dependent people have become on their phones I can go for days without getting a call (weeks if you only count calls I want to get). For me it is nice to have the convenience, especially as pay phoned disappear but why do I want to go through life with a phone stuck in my ear? I’ve still got a life.

 

One of the developments that enable all those capabilities on a tiny device is the cloud. You just don’t have the room to store things or install programs on a device you can carry around in your pocket but the creation of cloud computing allows those complicated and bulky activities to happen some where else. All you need is an internet connection. So today we can run complex activities from portable devices. You can watch movies, play video games and run elaborate software without providing much infrastructure.

 

All this stuff happened long before anybody bothered to tell us about the cloud and by the time we learned it was too late. We were already there. These days people are trying to catch up and put all their activities into coordination because there are many cloud platforms and they are not completely compatible. As one pundit explained, the cloud is like the electric company. When you plug in an appliance, you have no idea where the electrons running the appliance originate. You have no idea how to produce them, manage them or transport them. But you don’t care because the electric company agrees to have them available when you want them. No muss. No fuss.

In the US we expect the electric company to be reliable, meaning that the electrons will be available when we need them. They call it reliability and most everywhere, reliability is so good that we seldom think about it.

In the cloud , it is much more difficult to evaluate reliability because first, we don’t know what cloud supplier is responsible for what activity and second we think it is all being done on our device. Failure in the cloud is still unfamiliar territory but expect to see it become more of an issue as more and more of our activities move to the cloud. Big news this week was a cloud failure. It got fixed but the impact of the failure reveals how much we have become dependent on services that we cannot control. Did you notice?

Amazon Cloud Goes Down 

Clearly we all need to become more cloud savvy even when we are not selecting and purchasing cloud services for ourselves. More and more of what we do will be cloud based and knowing what the cloud is will be increasingly important. And also understanding what it is not.

Top 5 Things The Cloud Is Not

Getting out of the cloud and back to earth, we like to think that America is still a land of rugged indepent citizens fighting for individual rights against the increasing tyranny of big government. It is looking more and more like an old fashioned fantasy. We are turning into sheep. Does anybody thing that speed traps are a tool of a good and responsible government? Of course not. They are cash machines for the inefficient bureaucracies to feed their power addiction. Still you find people who just aren’t ready to wimp out.. People who know what is right and are willing to do what they can, where they can to fight back. Like this woman in Houston.

Pedestrian thrown in jail for 12 hours

Speed traps

We may not be a police state yet. But we get closer every minute. Just wait until those Cops get on the cloud.

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Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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Jun 242012
 

Three stories made the cut this week. You know that our standards here at the Coot’s News Service are high. We look for positive stories that can encourage you in life and if you are a regular reader you understand that those stories are hard to find. Each week is a crap shoot but sometimes we get lucky. Today we have three stories of encouragement with ideas that can inspire you or at least keep you plugging away. Let’s start here.

What’s good about getting old? 

Old Age- you can’t fight it.

As you probably know, ‘OLD’ is our middle name here at Cantankerous Old Coots. We tray to make it a badge of honor since there is absolutely nothing we can do to change that fact. Still being old carries a lot of baggage. Nobody chooses to grow old. It just happens to be a a fact of life. There is only one thing you can do to stop getting older and the finality of doing it causes most of us to accept our fate. We make all kinds of rationalizations about getting old, trying to pretend that there is actually something good about it. It is a futile exercise but we are drawn to the effort. We want to believe even while trying to remember what it was like when all your body parts worked and the future excited you. Well today’s lead article make the case that having an old brain makes up for all that you have lost. I’m not buying it, you understand but it takes your mind from thinking about getting older or the even more unpleasant alternative.

The aging brain: Why getting older just might be awesome

Back to reality. Do you read crime novels? Reading fiction about more interesting lives is a diversion many enjoy. Thinking about committing the ‘perfect’ crime is a natural result. Maybe we would never actually attempt that perfect crime but the fantasy of trying can pass many hours. It’s probably a good thing that mystery writers make a pretty good living. Otherwise their fertile imaginations might be directed to real criminal acts. I’ve often wondered whether these writers are ever tempted to take matters into their own hands and whether the law enforcement establishment would be able to catch them if they did. Today’s second story suggests that real crime may be more difficult than the made up ones in the novels.

California Mom Accused Of Planting Drugs In Volunteer’s Car Wrote Novel About ‘Perfect Crime’

Finally just one more story I can’t resist. Every day we all get bombarded with self- improvement ideas. Who of us is perfect. We could all lose a few pounds, get in better shape, learn a new skill, be a better person. You know what I mean. It’s the American curse. We are just never good enough. There is always one more thing to do before we are who we want to be. Meanwhile, we put life on hold because until we get it all right, there is no point in moving on. Well what it we are good enough right now? What if the opportunities we pass on because we are too busy making that final tweak before reaching perfection will never come again? What if we don’t even try living while we are getting ourselves right?

What if?

So that’s the news for this week. CNS hopes that the stories made you think. As you probably know, when you get old, thinking is about all you have left.

 

 

Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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