Mar 132011
 

It’s not the best of times!

It’s a really bad news day. There is something going on in Japan that is hogging all the news outlets.   Now Japan is a fine country and all but, it just makes no sense to have that small island grab all the headlines. Anyway, at the Coots New Service, we bring you the stories that you might otherwise miss. You have probably heard all you want to hear about Japan for a long time. CNS had to dig deep this week and even then the stories are thin but CNS doesn’t rest and we still have the news you would otherwise miss right here, right now.

Starting right here in the USA, there is tragedy involving millions of deaths. Somehow the fact that the dead are sardines has pushed this story to the back pages. Redondo Beach California welcomed an nvasion of dead sardines filling the harbor.

Millions of dead sardines

Not only is this an incredible waste of valuable resources, there is a big cleanup required and the smell is unimaginable.

Also in California, northern California is preparing a big bash to celebrate the 75th birthday of the Gloden Gate Bridge. Plans include new exhibits to tell the story of the bridge.

Big plans for Golden Gate Bridge’s 75th anniversary

And if you are going to San Francisco, those flowers in your hair may get wilted getting through airport security. The TSA has discovered that some of its body scanners are malfunctioning with radiation levels many times normal. The are retesting the scanners but until then you have the choice of a feel-up or a blast.

The Golden Gate Bridge and San Francisco, CA a...

Image via Wikipediahey are retesting their equipment but meanwhile you have the choice of a feel-up or a blast of radiation. Flying is such fun these days.

TSA to retest airport body scanners for radiation

On the sports front, a Nevad man has earned the world title for ‘natural voice’ Elk calling. CNS understands that this means that he uses no implements or enhancements to produce the mellow sounds that the elk just can’t resist. The good news is that he likve in Nevada. There is quite enough traffic in my neighborhood without adding a herd of elk to the mix.

Elko man wins world title in ‘natural voice’ elk calling

Other sports news is less cheerful. It seems that collusion between the National Football League owners and players is going to give everybody a year off. Everybody seems to think that they were trying to keep the games going on as usual for next year but a leak from inside the negotiations has revealed that it was all a sham. Both the owners and players were fed up with the hectic schedules and the arbitrary requirments to run a season (especially those pink shoes) and so they arranged this tussle to give them an excuse to take a year off.

Lockout, decertification put league, players in limbo

CNS always looks for a special story to wind up the summary each week and today we have one you will all love, whatever your political persuasion and your entertainment preferences may be. It is the combo you have been waiting for – Justin Bieber and Sarah Palin, together at last.  Coots think they make a mad couple!

Justin Bieber and Sarah Palin together at last.

That’s all from CNS for this week.

Sarah Palin at the Time 100 Gala, in Manhattan...

Image via Wikipedia

 

NYC signing September 1,2009 Nintendo Store - NYC

Image via Wikipedia

Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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  4 Responses to “Coot’s News Service- March 13, 2011”

  1. Not nearly enough pizzas in that harbor.

  2. Or enough oil.

  3. Thanks for putting things in proper perspective Ralph. This whole Japan thing has occupied a little too much of my imagination. Back to the important stuff like Justin and Sarah.

  4. Hansi,
    That’s what we do here at Coots.

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