Feb 232015
 
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Most of the time, when you think of an oil stain, you think ugly, dirty, slimy…something to be cleaned up as soon as possible.

Change perspective and that opinion can change as well. I have a brand new oil stain in my house, and I like it!

It’s rather large too. And I did it on purpose.

Now, y’all already had been wondering how I was allowed to walk around free in society rather than being locked away in an institution like the crazy uncle nobody in your family talks about, and this will probably confirm it.

“Did you hear about Bob? He dumped a bunch of oil on the floor in his yurt…and brags about it! He claims the stain is almost exactly half of a 30 foot diameter circle!

“He’s not planning to clean it up, either…not even scattering some Oil Dry.”

BTW…a note about oil dry. If y’all have a cat (God only knows why folks want cats, but some do. I’ll bet Ralph is weird that way…among others.) you can save some money on cat maintenance by bypassing that expensive kitty litter at the store. Just go buy a 50 lb. bag of oil dry at the local auto parts store. Most (90%) kitty litters are exactly the same thing, just with perfume added.

Seriously. Almost all of the kaolin (clay) in the country is mined and packaged within 200 miles of me, and I’ve been in the plants. They run bags down the line bagging the dried, flaked clay and labeling it oil dry. When they are done, they change bags and turn on a perfume injector. They then run more clay, with a penny or two’s worth of perfume sprayed on it, use a kitty litter label instead of oil dry, and charge you 5-6 times as much.

And you pay it.

And you think I’M nuts…

But anyway…back to the oil stain discussion…

Remember? This is a story about oil stains

(Shades of “Alice’s Restaurant”, all 18 minutes and 36 seconds of it. Want to hear it…and other weird songs like “The Streak”, and “I Am My Own Grandpa”? Go over to JuicyMaters and play the music player in the sidebar. This week’s genre is “oddities”. Better hurry…next week will probably be ether gospel or bluegrass).

Anyway, yes, I have a large new oil stain covering half my house, and I’m glad of it. It all depends on perspective.

If it helps you understand any better how I can actually LIKE an oil stain, it might help you to know the brand of oil It consists of.

Minwax.

 

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Bob@HayleStorm Interactive

Bob comes to us with a skeptical attitude and a full cup of Cantankerousness. He also writes about homesteading and yurts over at JuicyMaters.com and rants about politics at Common-Sense-Conversation.com Most of the time, though, you'll find him at HayleStorm.net, cranking out great websites for clients OR writing tutorials teaching them to build their own sites.

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