Jul 102011
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LONDON - NOVEMBER 16:  In this photo illustrat...

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I think the reporters are getting it.

There is actually some good news this week even if you have to tease the stories a bit to make it work. It’s all in the interpretation. The President has been talking about job creation for years now. First it was with lazer-like focus and then we heard that it’s his first thought upon getting out of bed each day. Despite that concentration, the man has to be frustrated because those jobs have been slow in coming. Well that is about to change. Nobody is telling the details but apparently now, the President has it all figured out. How do I know? It’s this headline from today.

Top Obama adviser says unemployment won’t be key in 2012

Something big is coming. Now the President is going to get serious and make those jobs appear. And it gets better!  Not only will jobs not be a problem, the President wants to solve the mortgage problem as well- or at least part of it. If you don’t get one of those new jobs the President is creating and stay unemployed, he wants to pay your mortgage for you. You can’t lose under the Presidents two pronged approach, either you get a job or he pays your mortgage. It doesn’t get much sweeter than that. Arnn’t you proud to be an American?


There are also good signs from Congress which is about to back away from banning incandescent light bulbs. Those old standard light bulbs were given a death sentence a few years back. Congress wanted to force everybody to use those funny compact florescents that your electric company keeps urging you to buy. (Does it ever make you wonder what is wrong with America today when the electric compnay- which supposedly makes money by selling you electricity- will pay you to use less? Who makes up the difference? This being America, it’s you the taxpayer. You the taxpayer are paying your electric company to pay you to turn off your air conditioner and buy crummy light bulbs. This happens because of the kind help of your elected representatives. But I degress.) Anyway Congress is having second thoughts about telling you what to buy until they are sure they can legally make you buy health insurance so, for now, they will reconsider letting you buy any old light bulb you want.

House GOP set to repeal incandescent bulb ban

If you are like me, you hate those self checkout lanes at stores. They are confusing, annoying and demeaning ways to separate you from your money. What clearer signal can you get from a retailer that you, the customers, are an annoying inconvenience than to eliminate completely any human interface in the buying process. I don’t know about you but if I want to eliminate human beings from my life, there isn’t anything I can’t buy on the internet and get delivered where my embarrassments are private and not public. The good news this week is that retailers may finally be recognizing that human beings might be an advantage in the retail market. One grocery company is getting rid of its self-checkout lanes.

Major grocer getting rid of self-checkout lanes

The final bit of good news is about higher education. You know those guilt trips that everybody suffers because they haven’t put aside a couple hundred thousand dollars to put their kid through a ‘good’ school. Well the word is out. College is a scam. Bill Gates, Michael Dell and Richard Branson never graduated from college. Save your money.  Get your kid a job- or better set him up in business.

The College Scam

Or maybe blow it on a cruise. I hear you can get some screaming deals these days.

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Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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  6 Responses to “Coot’s News Service- If there is good news out there today, We’ll find it.”

  1. I hate self check-out. There’s one chain, Fresh ans Easy, where that’s all it is. Scan the bar codes, insert money into machine, get change dispensed. All they left out was: bend over.

  2. Hansi,
    I’m sure that’s the next step.

  3. I love your commentaries on those positive headlines, Ralph! Especially on those self check-out lanes. “We customers are annoying inconvenience that must be eliminated completely” Hahahaha, this cracked me up totally.

    I used to actually like those scanners and self check-out lanes before, it gave me the feeling that I was in charge and I was trusted as a customer. I like how I only need to pack stuff only once, directly into the bag, but I understand that it is frustrating for some people. Anyways “bending over” as a next step that Hansi suggested makes me laugh big time since I am a visual type of person. 🙂 This was a great start of the day! Thanks guys! 😀

  4. Nella,
    Glad you enjoy the good news here at Coots News Service. It’s not easy. I know what you mean about self-service check out. I did kind of like them at first too, but that was before the internet. Now I figure why should I leave my house at all. Come back anytime.

  5. All kinds of good news!

    * Given the free jobs, and free houses, I cannot imagine what I’m going get, what with not having either a job or a mortgage. Wowza!

    * Since college has now been proven to be a total waste of time, those with the most education… are the most disadvantaged. Not only are their earnings a decade retarded, they shown to be foolish and conventional. No place in The New Economy for such, nosireebob.

    * Fresh and Easy is a Tesco chain, IIRC. I’ll leave looking up Tesco as an exercise for the reader. Again, if I recall correctly, they did manage to set up in San Fran despite being a chain…

  6. Dave,
    You’re right. There’s a great day coming for American’s when the President finally gets some traction. There may even be hope for the overeducated now that we need more checkout people.

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