May 152011
 
Scotch

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It’s another frustrating week- nothing new about that!

In our weekly quest for some good news to report this week, your Coot’s correspondent confesses to some frustration. As always there is a preponderance of bad news caused principally by the perverse need for humans to gloat over somebody else’s misfortune. The Coot’s News Service tries to stay above this pettiness but sometimes bad news is actually good news. Take big cities. What good has ever come from big cities? Too many people crammed together is a recipe for disaster so therefore bad news for cities is good news for humanity.

I told you that the Coot’s News Service leaves not stone unturned.

We start the news this week with stories with the hopeful message that cities are not the answer. First the news that people under 30 are deserting New York City for greener pastures.

New Yorkers under 30 plan to flee city, says new poll; cite high taxes, few jobs as reasons

And if people are fleeing New York City, the high murder rate in Dallas will surely encourage savvy residents to relocate as well.

Killings Averaging 1 Daily in Dallas

Perhaps they should consider moving to Frisco now that civilization has arrived.

Woman Bursts into Joyful Tears During In-N-Out Grand Opening

There is some real good news this week even as tornadoes continue to terrorize the country. This story tells how a young boy survived a tornado that destroyed his hour by hiding in a dryer.

Boy rides out storm in dryer

In International news, it appears that recent elections may free the oppressed Scottish minority from the oppressive yoke of British domination. It is not clear just yet how this will play out and what it will mean to lovers of Scotch whisky all around the world. This Coot hopes that freedom for the Scots won’t mean that they have enough money to drink it all themselves leaving nothing to export.

Landslide Election Brings Scottish Independence Closer

Our final news item brings togther two of our favorite people, The president and Justn Bieber. With such a powerful duo, it just has to be good news.

Justin Bieber And President Obama Team Up To Make A Fan’s Dreams Come True

So that’s the news for this week. It wasn’t easy finding good news and even harder to give it the best spin. Come back next week. We can always hope that the news will get better.

Ralph

Ralph is the inspiration for Cantankerous Old Coots and is our Grand Duke of Cantankerousness

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  4 Responses to “Coot’s News Service- May 15, 2011”

  1. OK….I like the woman in Frisco Texas FINALLY getting an In n Out Burger in her home town. They are the best burgers, and employed both of my kids as teenagers. Ooooh…Kinda fell like a double double right now 🙂

  2. Hansi,
    I have to agree about In n out. It’s good to learn that civilization is finally reaching Texas but still the stores are so packed that I al never willing to wait in the lines.

  3. Half those NY people will land in San Fran, I’m sure.

  4. Dave,
    Out of the frying pan into the fire. Remember when you were young and stupid?

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